My story
When I was eight years old, I lost sight in my left eye. Doctors weren’t aware of the cause and had been treating the symptoms since I was a baby. I later discovered I was born with a rare virus that caused inflammation of the retina, the light-sensing tissue at the back of the eye, when it reactivated at age sixteen in my right eye. Luckily, I met a retina specialist who restored the vision in my right eye after two weeks of intensive care.
I was bullied for being the “cross-eyed girl” for most of my middle school and high school years. I remember this deep desire to belong and fit typical beauty standards. I wanted to shave all the dark hair off my body, pluck my thick Argentinian eyebrows, and have two symmetrical eyes.
When I was nineteen years old, in my second year of college, I had a hemorrhage in my left eye and painful headaches. Instead of understanding what might be the cause of this dormant virus to reactivate (likely my relationship to stress and low immunity), I was thrilled for a reason to exchange my eye and for a prosthetic. One cosmetic surgery led to four, and lots of recovery during my early twenties. Despite these procedures, I was unsatisfied and felt incomplete.
In 2014, at age twenty-six, I had a lapse in my antiviral medication. I was depressed, working 60+ hours a week, and under intense stress. I had taken on more responsibility and let my health care fall by the wayside. The day I took my first vacation, I had another viral infection, this time in my right eye, and rushed back home within 72 hours of my departure. I remember wanting to see Iguazú Falls at the border of Argentina and Brazil and spend time with family and friends. It took ten weeks to recover, and my mother took time off that September to take care of me. I regained 100% of my vision after surgery; it was even better than before. I remember the first thing I saw were the skyscrapers on Park Avenue and the blue, sunlit sky.
What healed me, in addition to the immediate care of skilled surgeons, was love and the conviction that no matter what happened, I’m going to live my best life. At that time I’d found The Secret by Rhonda Byrne and listened to many other books about miracles and manifestation from the library. My whole perception changed, my family came on board, and we all adopted this new way of thinking: our thoughts create our reality. My home was filled with positivity, love, and light.
Twelve years and eight surgeries later, I am in excellent health. So much beauty arose from regaining my eyesight at age twenty-six. I grew out of this obsession with fitting in and learned to love my uniqueness. I learned how to care for my body and developed habits that prioritized my self-care. And I learned that seeing is about more than the eyes.